The legend of the Bitch Baby
by Kirbascious
Summary: the legend of the Locketeers worst enemy.


Dear fans,

Like many of you I was really,really pissed off by what they just did to me.

How they treated Lockets was absolutely unforgivable.

I thought it was a joke at first, a dream sequence. But no, they actually did it. They actually did THAT to Lockets. I was absolutely outraged.I wanted to go bazerka and kill all the their hearts out and force them to eat it in the name of Lockets. How could they do that? Lockets is one of the most beloved characters of all time. He should NOT be treated like that.

I have thus written a story about how they should be treated. A proper example of writing and respecting Lockets!

A little Later, Lord locket was taking a shit.

He was having trouble though.

It felt like days passed and still no sign of release.

"Help..Errrr... ahhhh! Christ! when is this epic poo gonna pass!?" Lord locket exclaimed, His face wincing with effort.

He made every effort in his little boy body to expel this demon thing from his womanly back side.

By this point Lord lockets poo-tubes were all bent out of shape. It has been a bad day.

Just as Lord locket was going in for another push..

Without warning the bathroom door suddenly burst open unexpectedly. Yeepers!

"Well hello...Lord locket" a enticing voice gasped from the doorway.

A mysterious figure posed leaning against the door frame. His deep, sensual voice which Lord locket knew immediately. His mind began racing and a nervous sweat began pouring from his face and groinal area.

"Pope locket... is that you? wha- what are you still doing awake...?"

He appeared in nothing but a towel, seemingly ready to take a steamy shower.

However He couldn't with Lord locket near by...they were like family locket was like His father.

Any sane person would never allow their own father to see them in the nude. Right? RIGHT!? SHIT!"

"Oh I felt dirty from masturbating all day...ya ever feel dirty Lord locket?"

"Y-Yes, I mean NO! NO! NO! Never" Lord locket shrieked, He became so immensely worked up he cleaned his colon clear of the demon feces that had been clogging it. His voice also cracked like he was 13 again, but in comparison to the loud flatulence he just unleashed, who cares? Pope locket heard though, and giggled like a adorable baby girl laugh. It sent tingles all up Lord locket's spine.

"Oh you've always been the shy one in the family, Lord locket..."

Lord locket was not shy, at all. He defeated bitch baby and blew up His evil machines for Christ's sake! and now he suddenly found himself speechless. Was He going to see his metaphorical father literally naked? Little did he know, that was merely a sprinkle on the banana split of carnal pleasures that was to come.

"..the shy and excitable one." said Pope locket finishing the sentence He started earlier.

"Wh-what the..." and before Lord locket could send the third word out of His mouth..

..Pope locket's towel dropped to the floor,setting his swingy bits free into the mist of the shower.

Lord locket noticed everything on him instantly. His lick-able figure,his hypnotically wide middle leg and the big thingy colored birth mark on his rear, which made Him feel awkward.

Still, the sight of his near perfect body caused Lord locket's penis to become very hard. It stood erect and proud, pointing straight towards the mighty heavens.

"hehe oh my Lord locket...you're more impressive than I thought."

"uh... ye-yeah, th-thaaanks Pope locket, you're cute too." THIS IS SO WRONG! It raced through his head at lightning speed. But the beautiful, wet, soapy body that stood before him spoke otherwise. Him shapely body was everything Lord locket could want in something to wank to. Yet did family like relationship matter?..

...

...

Or...did it make it better?

But just as Lord locket was commiting. Commiting to a path that they couldn't go back from.

Lord locket burst into the toilet!

"What are you too upto?"

"Err..nothing" said Lord locket as he causally slipped his pants back on.

Pope locket, who Lord locket didnt notice, picked up his towel and backed out slowly.

"Really?"

"I was just having a shit...see?" Lord locket gestured to his shit.

"Oh, thats a shit all right! One hell of a shit!

Ok, if your done we better go"

So Lord locket put his other pants on and left. He had a serious case of blue balls, but at least his anus didnt feel so bad now.

As he walked out Pope locket whispered one word. A word fall of hope.

"Later"

Lord locket Giggled.

Fortunately, their traveling companion was as oblivious as ever, and didn't notice.

It was a cold day in locketville. A storm was coming...

Pope locket winked at Lord locket when no one else was looking.

"Later" he mouthed at him silently so no one could hear.

Holy cinnamon roll was taking a shower this hot day.

She was naked, enjoying the water dripping over her wet, naked body.

She was washing the blood off her body from the recent monsters she had just killed.

...the water smoothly rolled over her firm breasts.

The blood driped off like whipped cream in the ocean.

...the water dripping down her Cooleyhopper. "OwwwhhhOwwhhh" she said from the pleasure;

She had just finnished doing Banana in a fruit salad using a brief history of time by steven hawking. She was dreaming of lord lockets manly lance pulsating inside her.

She was also singing "500 Miles" at the top of her voice

Then, suddenly, lord locket paraglided in.

"Sorry I have to interupt you, naked in the shower, but we must go!"

"What? im taking a shower, Im naked, cant you see that?"

lord locket could see that she was completely naked in the shower.

"yes, I can see that you are naked, in the shower" lord locket said.

"But we must go...Bitch baby is back!."

"What not bitch baby!" she punched the wall out of her deep inner range.

"Yes!"

"Oh!"

holy cinnamon roll got out of the shower and put some clothes onher hot steaming naked wore a dress the same color as her eyes her father brought her from the city.

After she was no longer naked, they left to defeat bitch baby.

Along the way they summoned Lockets, who joined them on their quest.

"I will join you on your quest to defeat bitch baby said Lockets.

"Thanks for joining us on our quest," said lord locket;

"Yes, we need your help to defeat bitch baby" said holy cinnamon roll.

So, holy cinnamon roll lord locket and now holy cinnamon roll left by hangglider for their epic quest to defeat the prince of all uglyness ...

Bitch baby!

"You know, I think bitch babys naphew would be better bustier dont you think?" said holy cinnamon roll.

"Dunno, you see he is smarter than some g-strings." replied lord locket.

"True."

"What ARE you talking about?" said lord locket.

And they all laughed.

Because they knew lord locket would kill them if they didnt.

Later, Lord locket and Pope locket were alone again.

"Its Later" said Pope locket, pulling Lord locket towards the bathroom.

"But what about the others?"

"I'll just tell them you are helping me shower. They wont suspect a thing"

"True. They are all idiots"

Then, suddenly, Pope locket was naked. Lord locket wondered how He did that. He must have been nearly naked this whole time!

The shower turned on...

..Lord locket was already.

Pope locket lathered up good and fine. The soap dripped off His body at a seductively slow pace. Lord locket could not contain the powerful urge of excitement that raced through His veins.

The alluring look of his nudie comrade became too much for him to fathom and his erect penis launched a mighty wad of semen directly onto Lord locket's eye.

There Lord locket sat, His pink panties pulled quickly down at his ankles, on a toilet full of poop with His bodly fluids on full display, eyes bulging from His face.

Pope locket giggled as Lord locket's dignity shriveled and died, but Lord locket had always enjoyed that delightful snicker, even after He found out He was His own flesh and blood.

"Well...wh-what do we do now?" Lord locket said, desperately trying to sound suave.

"It. We do it."

"it?"

"yes. it"

"we do it?"

"yes"

"oh"

...and with that Pope locket jumped on Lord locket. What little remained of their clothes plopped of quickly. Some fell in the toilet.

"um... lets g-get you outta my toil-dreams and into my bed." Lord locket stuttered, desperately trying to be slick, yet he knew it was hopeless to be suave on the shitter.

Pope locket hopped gleefully out of the shower, the soap continued pouring from His shapely locket stood up from the toilet, His naughty bits proudly waving about and His pants still down around His ankles. He hurried to chase His shapely body down.

He fell in the door way, tripping over His pants. He pulled His face up from the floor and gazed at Pope locket, DANCING ON THE KITCHEN TABLE

The night wreaked of eroticisms...and Lord locket could see that it was going to be a all you can eat porkfest.

And it was!

Pope locket was soon ridding Lord locket like a pogo stick.

"Poke me! DEEPER! DEEPER! GODDAMNIT!"

"Oh God I'm going to hell!" Lord locket screamed.

Lord locket still had his Hawaiian shirt on and Pope locket was dripping soapy water all over the bed.

His perky penis swung around, like a happy child on a moon bounce. UP UP DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT LEFT RIGHT!, Lord locket liked it. It was a big, beautiful thing that ached to be sucked on.

Lord locket especially liked that from this angle He could not see the awkward birth mark on His ass cheek. Which was a relief. Lord locket wanted to be hard and strong where it counts for the person He had always thought of as His grandma.

"Oh Lord locket!" He breathed heavily, deep and cavernous "is what we're doing wrong!?"

"OH GOD YES!" He yelled back at His naked grandma.

"GOOD! YES! YES! YES! YES FATHER!" Pope locket screamed. (Authors Notes: omg!)

When it was over they cleaned themselves, the room and the nearby skyscrapper down.

It took awhile - fortunately they finished before any of their friends got back. So their little secret was safe...for now.

Lord locket followed the screaming till he reached his brother, who was being tortured.

There was blood all over the on the cieling too, as if really bad violence had been was horific.

"lord locket! Over here! quick! help me! It hurts"

"And not in the good way :("

Then lord locket saw the final boss, who had been torturing his brother.

Lord locket shot bullets from his ak-74 really fast and the bullets went WAM! and hit bitch baby in the eyes and then he couldnt see(because blood was pooring out).

"I will never make love to you again" lied lord locket "We were such good lovers!"

lord locket said "Eat This!" and punched bitch baby in the eye and the bitch baby went to his knees.

And his blood doth stain the floor on which they walked.

Lord locket said "He is dead now, you is safe"

"Thank you!"

"Glade I could help, brother"

"But you should come earlier next time!" and they laughed.


End file.
